I found a gardening pun on Twitter today and thought it would be fun to share. I’ve compiled a few more, and welcome any additional puns or quips in the comments section below. Here’s hoping they tickle your green thumb.
A Nod to Theater:
Compostaphile and Compostaphobe — To rot or not to rot . . . David Hobson’s Garden Humour
“I should love to perform “There Are Fairies in the Bottom of My Garden” (Bea Lillie’s signature song), but I don’t dare. It might come out “There Are Fairies in the Garden of My Bottom.” – Noel Coward from Musicals101
What do you call it when worms take over the world? Global Worming. The Deep Middle
What do you get if you divide the circumference of a pumpkin by its diameter?
Pumpkin pi. Organic Universe
My wife’s a water sign. I’m an earth sign. Together we make mud. – Rodney Dangerfield from Garden Digest
The new weed whacker is cutting-hedge technology. Twitter
My wife works over-thyme in her herb garden before she decides it is time to cummin.
Don’t expect a bonsai tree to grow the miniature planting it.
I will cut the grass only when I get mowtivated.
The research assistant couldn’t experiment with plants because he hadn’t botany.
Old gardeners never die they just vegetate.
Gardeners like to plant their feet firmly.
If you’re a gardener you might call yourself a ‘plant manager’.
from David Hobson’s Garden
The real meaning of plant catalog terminology:
“A favorite of birds” means to avoid planting near cars, sidewalks, or clothes lines.
“Grows more beautiful each year” means “Looks like roadkill for the foreseeable future.”
“Zone 5 with protection” is a variation on the phrase “Russian roulette.”
“May require support” means your daughter’s engineering degree will finally pay off.
“Moisture-loving” plants are ideal for landscaping all your bogs and swamps.
“Carefree” refers more to the plant’s attitude than to your workload.
“Vigorous” is code for “has a Napoleonic compulsion to take over the world.”
“Grandma’s Favorite” — until she discovered free-flowering, disease-resistant hybrids. Garden Digest