Halloween is in the air.
I’ve loved this festive day since I was a child. My sister and I enjoyed dressing up, making costumes from this and that, and anticipating the night. Of course, there were strict rules about where we could go, how long we could be out, and with whom, but we made the most of it.
We arrived home long before 8:00 with cold cheeks and a bag of candy. The candy haul would fuel a trading game in the weeks to come. We would spread the goods on the living room floor, count each item, then trade back and forth. We each had our favorites. It was also a way to extend the thrill of the night.
As adults, we found the excuse to dress up for parties or work events. We fixed each other’s hair or wig and donned false eyelashes. Sharon usually helped with my makeup since I’m an amateur and she’s the pro.
My sister and I no longer dress up, and the thrill of the day has passed. Sharon’s MS has advanced to such a degree that she can no longer walk or drive. She struggles to dress, and she needs help putting on her shoes. At the end of this month, the water therapy that helps sustain her is no longer covered by her health plan. The powers that be, determined that since she can’t get well, she can’t have physical therapy. Health “care” in this country often boils down to health insurance. It’s beyond depressing.
Today, I shampooed my sister’s hair in an inflatable sink, then wrapped it in a towel to dry. She’s lost the chance to shower two days a week after water therapy, robbing her of the dignity of basic hygiene. We are both bereft.
It’s hard to know where we go from here, so we’re improvising. Costumes and wigs no longer apply.
Tomorrow I’ll toss candy into the bags of costumed children after they knock at our door and yell, “trick-or-treat!” The night will be bitter and sweet.
Gardening Nirvana 
Lovely pictures of you both. I have e-mailed you today.
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Thank you, Derrick! I received your lovely note and will reply soon. xo
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Sweet memories and photos.
I’m sorry and sad that, as often, money are valued more than people and your beloved sister is no longer entitled to assistance that would improve the quality of her life.
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The system has certainly let your sister down badly. Thank goodness she has you. Hold on to those memories, they are precious. xxx
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I am so sorry the health system is letting you both down. My heart goes out to you. Those memories of the past will be doubly valuable now.
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Hugs to you and Sharon. I’m so glad she has you as a (as)sister.
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So very, very sorry! What a crabbed, cruel system we have here. It really is beyond comprehension that the insurance company should decline to pay for a therapy that helps your sister in so many ways.
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Such an unfair burden– another blow from the Empire, who only loves us as long as we pay the premiums, but deny us when our need arises. Makes me mad and sad.
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This makes me upset on your sister’s behalf. I don’t even know where to begin. I’m so sorry she is suffering. Thank God she has you.
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Oh ((( Alys ))), life is really piling on for you both. The lack of cooperation from Sharon’s insurance company is reprehensible! How do they sleep at night?! I recognize the photo with you in a green dress, what a fun day that was. Is home care an option at all? Like you need to frickin’ bathe to be healthy. Meanwhile, Maga monsters complain about so many BS problems, I can’t even. The selfishness of some (a small, arrogant, offensive minority) really is mind boggling. Hugs to you both.
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Sending you all giant squishy hugs, for what they are worth. I fully understand. There is no easy way through this situation. What was once fun can now only be a memory. I’m still here when you need to verbalize. I’ve never had much faith in medicine as it is now.
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Such a poignant musing. The sadness is palpable yet I appreciate that you balance it with present joy of interacting with today’s children at the door. ❤️❤️❤️
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You are a wonderful woman who loves your sister very much Alys. It is so unfortunate that the health insurance in the USA (you stated it correctly in your post its insurance and certainly not healthcare) boils down to whichever bean counter reviews Sharon’s case and insurance policy. It has nothing to do with what Sharon needs.. It’s really shameful. Terry and I wish Sharon the best and thankfully she has a sister like you.
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I am so sorry you both are going through this. Love to both of you.
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Love to you, too, Cindy. xo
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Alys, setting aside my anger and sadness for a minute …. can I start a Go Fund Me campaign to pay for her Water Therapy???? Let me know!!
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Laurie, thank you for this kind and generous offer. Much has transpired since I wrote this making water therapy a challenge as well, but I don’t want to let it pass without sending you my profound gratitude for your care. xo
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Ah Alys My heart goes out to you and your sister. I too am caring for my sister through a difficult illness it is heartbreaking and yet a honour. I wish more sweet moments eventhough may also be bitter. ❤❤️🩹
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Wilma, I’m sorry to have missed this comment from late October. You are a loving sister, and I’m sure a great comfort at her time of need. My heart goes out to you. xo
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xo
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I have never understood insurance. When I worked in Healthcare I was often having to explain to patients what wasn’t covered or why they had a deductible/copay that exceeded the procedure they were in need of. Awful. Lovely photos of you and your sweet sister.
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Thank you, Amy. I didn’t know you once worked in healthcare. You’ve seen it first hand, but like the rest of us, find it perplexing and confounding trying to sort through all the nonsense.
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I am so sorry to hear about the water therapy not being covered. I am glad you had those Halloween fun memories in the past and sorry to read that fun is no more.
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Thank you.
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I’m so sorry to hear your sister is no longer entitled to water therapy, Alys. Thank goodness she has you, though that can hardly be any real consolation.
By the way, your costumes look ace 😊
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Thank you, Helen.
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I am so sorry to hear that Sharon’s health has deteriorated and her care is being cut. That is such bad news. Health care seems to be in decline across the globe, unless you pay for it. So wrong.
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Dear Alys, I have just whizzed through the past year of your blog and am so sorry I lost touch… it seems I was unsubscribed and just assumed you weren’t blogging much. Your botanical cards are beautiful, your hike was interesting to read about, and the church fire was such a tragedy. Hope you have new premises now. And now your sister must be foremost in your mind. Wishing you both all the best. 🤗
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Cathy, thank you for taking the time to catch up on my year. I’m so glad we’re connected!
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So wrong, indeed. We seem to be moving in reverse, losing ground on issues of race, gender, health, the environment. It’s hard not to feel discouraged.
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Worth remembering, happy two sisters
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My heart goes out to you and your sister, Alys.
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